| | | | What To Do If Your Child Is Being Bullied |
By Sally A
Finding out that your child is being bullied is every parent's worst nightmare. Your first instinct might be to march straight into the school and demand to know how the bullies were allowed to get away with it, but this is not going to help your child much in the long term. Most parents think that they would know how to handle the situation effectively, but if you are anything like most parents, you probably have no real idea as to the best way to tackle the problem. What should you actually do if you discover that your child is being bullied?
Be supportive
If your child is being bullied, it is likely to have dented their self-confidence, which means that it is vital that you support him or her. It is tempting to advise your child to just ignore the situation, but this is unlikely to do much to resolve the bullying problem. In fact, it can actually make things worse. Children often bottle things up until it gets too much for them, so if your child has confided in you about the bullying, it is definitely a cry for help, and they are ultimately pleading with you to put a stop to it for them. If you advise your child to simply turn a blind eye, your child may mistakenly assume that you will be ignoring the situation too.
It is also important that your child does not think that you are suggesting that they are to blame for the situation. In the majority of cases, children often do absolutely nothing to provoke the bully (or bullies), which means that is not a good idea to ask them what they did wrong. As well as causing him or her to become even more upset, it is unlikely that he or she will ever want to confide in you again, as they will fear a similar reaction. Even if you do not agree with the way in which they might have handled the situation, do not criticize them.
Listen carefully
When your child explains what happened, listen carefully to every detail, as you will probably want to set up a meeting with a teacher at the school to discuss the problem, in which case you will need a very good idea of what actually happened, who was involved, and where the incident (s) took place. It is especially important to ask your child whether there were any witnesses that can be called upon to back up their version of events, as the bullies will undoubtedly provide a very different version.
You should be aware though that if the incident (s) involved pupils at the school but did not take place on school grounds, the school would be unlikely to do much about the problem, as it is out of their control.
The most important thing is to let your child that you fully support them, and that you intend to work with the school to solve the problem.
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