| | | | Polygamy-A Very Different Type of Marriage |
By Kristen Houghton
Polygamy as a form of marriage has been around for a long time. To be sure it is mentioned in the books of many world religions and still practiced in some countries as both a custom and a religious belief. In ancient times, it was a practice that was not only for religious purposes but political ones as well. It helped to connect tribes and dynasties through marriages in the hope that a man might think twice before attacking the lands of his in-laws. The women, made to enter these marriages, were, basically, live collateral.
Why would a person enter into a plural union in the twenty-first century? Most people are hard pressed to find something they would see as beneficial in a plural marriage.
In the USA there are varying statistics for the number of polygamous marriages. Some estimates are that over 80,000 men practice polygamy in this country, but there are no definitive government records.
Admittedly, most Americans find a polygamous relationship strange to say the least. Why would a man want to have more than one spouse; why would a woman be content to be a sister-wife? Is polygamy beneficial in any way to all parties concerned? Is it detrimental to women, causing an inequality in the marriage dynamics? Can it perpetuate forms of abuse?
Any one not born into a way of life has a difficult time understanding what they consider strange traditions. This is especially true when it comes to religions. The great Native American of the Nez Perce tribe, Chief Joseph, said, “It is easy to laugh at what you don’t understand.” This certainly includes spiritual beliefs.
And while absolute freedom of religion is guaranteed for all those living in the USA, the welfare of children takes precedence over any religion or tradition that puts a minor child in danger or holds any one person against their will.
Bringing the FDLS into a US court to answer questions about sexual, emotional and physical abuse is a positive step that is being taken by the state of Texas. Every one can and should have their say. Men, women, and especially, the underage mothers, should be heard. But it will be difficult.
It is going to take a long time to sort this out. Any one brought up to “obey without question” and who fears eternal damnation if they go against their religious leaders, is not going to make this easy for government authorities.
Perhaps we don’t fully understand the tradition of polygamy or the religion of those who practice it. But what we do understand is the fact of abuse so well hidden under the guise of religion.
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I can see both sides, having sex with the children and abusing should always be stopped first! but if there is none of that going on , then people should keep their noses out!
DianneTrenkle
Wow, really? I suppose....but how come polygamy and child molestation seem to go hand in hand? Could it be that these so called adults are warped, twisted and don't see things the way they should? I'm no expert, but staying out of these things has led to countless children being violated...if we don't step in, and put out noses in, who will protect these kids?
ChristineB
I dont think that they do go hand in hand. I think we only hear of the cults and not of the average everyday "looking" family. I watched a special on it last week - it had a girl who had escaped from the cult, as well as boys who had been kicked out of the cult, and then it had 4 average looking women who just happened to be in a palygamist relationship. the one family was 3 wives and 22 children and they did the everyday stuff ... school, extra curricular activities, etc. And none of them "expected" their children to follow in their footsteps - they were all given the freedom to choose their own religion and lifestyle.
I personally don't have a problem with palygamy, sharing my hubby with another woman is not the way I would choose to live, but it does not have any influence on my life. To me, it is just another way of life - no different than cultural traditions or religion. I do have a problem with the extremist sects that involve forcing children to be involved in a certain way - I believe that we have an obligation to protect the children in this country, especially when the parents are incapable of doing so, but I do not believe that all palygamists abuse their children.
dianerene
I guess I was talking more about the cults than polygamy....it does seem to me, at least from the little I know, that they do go hand in hand...for the cults. I don't know much about polygamists...thankfully!
ChristineB
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