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    The Long-Distance Relationship

    By Kristen Houghton     

    Think being away for long periods of time from the one you love won’t help your relationship to grow? Do you fear that if you’re not near the one you love, he will “love the one he’s near?” Are you thinking that the long-distance relationship you’re contemplating is crazy and so is anyone who enters into one?

    Surprise! Research has shown that a long-distance relationship can not only work, but can actually be good for you in the following different ways.

    The positive aspects of having to answer only to yourself when your partner is away, empowers you.

    The time and effort you expend to work on what you love brings personal satisfaction.

    The idea that you alone are principally in charge of your days and nights, uplifts your mental health in self sufficiency.

    There are other benefits as well. Sociologists say that the anticipation of seeing each other after being apart for long periods takes on a vacation-like quality. You are at your best, the same as you were when you first got together, only better. Growing individually, you have more to give to each other.

    We grow up with relationship myths. One of which is the idea that two people in love always have the need to be in reasonable physical proximity with each other. The hours spent apart are tolerated only because you know the person you love is close enough to see on a regular basis.

    When you’re in a relationship where each one is on separate coasts, seeing each other up close and personal can be limited to once a month if you’re lucky. Even in today’s world of computer cams, instant messages, phone video, and more, something is lacking. It isn’t the same as being able to hold hands over dinner or snuggle up with each other at night. For some, a bi-coastal or, “bi-country,” relationship is not what they need or would tolerate.

    But for many couples, being apart for long periods of time is a healthy benefit to their relationships. It is especially good for those building a career where travel or living in a specific area will enhance their work and their chances for advancement.

    There are other issues to consider about being apart. If you have a goal that will take most of your waking hours, if you work well into the night, or if you have the once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to achieve a dream, the benefit of working without distraction is priceless. Single-minded devotion to a project that will reap rewards either financially or personally is not a bad thing. A person happy with what they are doing in life, even if only for short periods of time, is a better partner in any relationship.

    Phone calls, computer “dates,” and regular contact keep the relationship strong and loving. And as far as infidelity is concerned, the sociological data proves that men and women in a committed long-distance relationship are no more apt to be unfaithful than partners who see each other every night. In fact, statistics show that there is an even lower percentage of cheating for couples involved in this type of relationship. The partners have a strong sense of comfortable commitment to each other and are involved in career-driven issues that take precedence in their lives.

    Like more traditional relationships, a long-distance one can have its problems and is not for every couple, but, if it is an agreeable part of your relationship, it is a healthy, beneficial lifestyle.

    Written by Kristen HoughtonRate this article:

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